Sunday, August 27, 2017

Remembering a dyslexic classmate, 30 years later

I remember this kid from my fourth grade class. Jack was his name, I think, or at least, that's what I'll call him here. He seemed bigger than the rest of us, maybe he had been held back already. It was widely known that he was a trouble maker. Didn't try. Didn't care. The teachers regarded him with unmasked frustration and hostility, and their assessment of him was not lost on the rest of us. I mean, how stupid were you, if you had made it all the way to the fourth grade (perhaps having even repeated a grade or two along the way) and you still couldn't read?

I also remember that Jack was good at fixing things. Taking them apart and putting them back together again. Ballpoint pens in particular. Fourth grade was a seminal year for this, because the great privilege of being a fourth grader was that you sometimes got to write with a pen instead of a pencil. But with this privilege also came the frustration of pens that would every so often stop working, and you'd circle and circle on the page, waiting for the ink to come out, but it never did. Jack could fix your pen for you. He did this for me one time, as I had been seated next to him in art or music class. I'd regarded him somewhat suspiciously, and with a bit of fear. He was supposed to be a bad seed, the kind of kid you didn't talk to, a bully.

But as he sat next to me and dismantled my pen, he hummed a bit. And I realized, I couldn't think of one single instance when he had actually caused trouble or done something wrong. All I could think of was teachers yelling at him or punishing him for things that wouldn't have even caused so much as a raised eyebrow if some other student had done it. All I could think of was how, whenever he was called upon to read a passage out loud in class, he would stumble over the words, getting many of them wrong. And the rest of the class would snicker, at best, or laugh outright in his face.

He wasn't the bully. He was bullied.

He was dyslexic.

With a smile, Jack handed me back my pen, and it worked just fine. I wondered why everyone thought he was such a bad kid. I wondered how you could be in the fourth grade and still not be able to read.

That was almost thirty years ago. And the truth is, precious little has changed for dyslexic kids. My son would be Jack if I had listened to the piece-of-shit teachers who told me what a challenge he was, how he needs to try harder, how all we can do is wait and see. My son would be Jack if I had been gaslit by the piece-of-shit principal and school reading specialists and counselors who told me I was being unfair and unreasonable, who have cornered me and ripped me to shreds, who have done everything in their power to get me to shut the fuck up about dyslexia. My son would be Jack if I allowed myself to be intimidated by these overgrown middle school mean girls, by family members who deride me for being too "negative." My son would be Jack if I were anything other than stubborn as fuck. He would be Jack if I hadn't found Ms. V, if we hadn't had the means to pay thousands of dollars (with no end in sight) on dyslexia tutoring.

I thought about Jack the other day, and I wondered what ever happened to him. I'm not sure if I remember him being part of my class beyond grade school. I hoped to god he didn't blow his brains out or overdose, having spent his whole life believing he wasn't worth a damn. I hoped instead he invented something amazing, became a CEO or a stop motion film maker, or a software engineer.

I hope that my son makes it through, but unlike neurotypical children, who have every opportunity handed to them without question, Will has no such assurance. For dyslexic kids now, thirty years ago, sixty years ago, it's still the same: the very people whose job it is to help you succeed in life only sabotage you every step of the way.

Thanks for reading.

239 comments:

«Oldest   ‹Older   201 – 239 of 239
SEO CANADA said...

I personally use them exclusively high-quality elements : you will notice these folks during 메이저놀이터

SMA said...

The first powerful tool is any foundation bb cream Well, you can take care of your body on a daily basis before, during and after taking a mild hot shower by using top-quality bath accessories. This is something surreal. As I was quite impressed by the efficient services of using Dubai Grocers so thought of giving it a try

SMA said...

winter clothes are selling hot because the season is at its full peak. From western wear to sleepwear and from festive clothes to regular eastern wear, the articles available of top clothing brands give everyone plenty of options. While there are many options in ready-to-wear clothing, there is an unwavering love for ladies’ cloths in our country and that is understandable.

Efbusiness Agent said...

Your blog is nice. Please check my website page for Best Project Management Services in Dubai and recommend me some Unique titles and blog content to write for the business website

r2itfz said...

It's a very nice blog, and appreciating a good article is always important for us.We are the best manufacturing and engineering equipment supplier so do contact us r2itfz

John Wick said...

Regularly changing your locks is the best way to ensure your home is secure. Locksmith Leeds can assist you every time your locks require changing. They can help with any type of door, old or new. Leeds professional locksmiths will upgrade your locks and make sure they work correctly. You will also save money and time. If you are looking to upgrade your locks, contact a professional in your local area and let them handle the job.

John Wick said...

If you need a a St Albans Emergency Locksmith to provide services for your home or business, you've come to the right place. This professional can handle a variety of residential locksmith issues, including gaining entry to locked premises and unlocking sentry safes. In addition, you can change the locks in your home or business, including pad, club and entry door lock.

Leo gaming said...

Locksmith provides services in key cutting, changing locks, repairs auto locks also helped in repairing faulty and damaged damaged locks. Locksmith upgrade locks according to BS3621 British standards which fulfill your all insurance requirements. All Locksmiths are (Master Locksmiths Association) MLA Approved so we are fully vetted, inspected and qualified.

Tony said...

UK's dedicated and professional Shop fitters are here. We offer many membership benifits to help support those in shoplifting and interrior. we also offers a number of benefits which can help your business win work, train your team. We show you how to create that first impression that will keep customers coming back.

SMA said...

Best summer footwear

Reau said...

Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic

Reau said...

Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic
Just Mazic


rigel said...

The portable power station can be quite useful while traveling. It’s a battery-powered generator.
portable power station

David Stangley said...

Buy Unstitched Lawn from Pakistani best women wear brand and find your desired products from Declare at reasonable price.

Arsal Butt said...

Comfort has always been their first priority. No matter which design you pick, With lots of branded shoes for women and sports shoes for men available online here.

Lifestyle said...

In today’s world fashion is very important to look good. In fashion nice Pakistani wedding Dresses are having key significance. We help you with Pakistan's made hand embroidered dresses which can give decent look to your personality.

Premium Account Generator said...

Nice updates..
Free Tiktok Followers

idprorusia said...

Thanks for sharing this information to me and this article is good, please visit us at IDPRORUSIA we have some good art design.

Sapphire Collection said...

Nice updates
bath-robes

Arsal Butt said...

Cotton pads for periods in Pakistan by Butterfly Breathable are a great option for absorption and comfort, as they allow your skin to breathe and help prevent irritation.

Lifestyle said...

Thanks a lot for sharing such a useful information with us! Also, I have something related to your blog like if someone is looking for Summer lawn Dresses for women can buy here.

digiminds said...

Nice update. thanks for sharing.
digiminds

Arsal Butt said...

With its focus on premium materials and expert craftsmanship, it has become known for offering some of the most enticing designs in ready-made dresses.

Arsal Butt said...

This dress by JM online clothing boutique is sure to turn heads and make you feel confident and stylish.

Asian Verification said...

The Valve Steam Deck, developed by Valve Corporation, combines the convenience of a steam deck handheld gaming console with the power of a gaming PC.

https://ptligajuara.com/ said...

PTliga Situs judi taruhan bola terpercaya dan aman

Ziya said...

Very interesting to read...You have provided a nice article....Thanks for sharing. custom erp developers

tiktok downloader said...

I couldn't agree more with the points made in this article. It's essential to raise awareness about this issue, and I appreciate the author's effort in doing so.
no watermark tiktok hd

tiktok downloader said...

Excellent work! The author's extensive research and well-crafted arguments make this article a must-read.
tiktok.downloader hd

tiktok downloader said...

I couldn't agree more with the points raised in this article. Well done!
video tiktok downloader hd

Pixel Smartphones said...

Dubai, with its scorching temperatures, is a place where your air conditioner is not just a luxury but a necessity. When your AC breaks down, especially during the peak of summer, it can be unbearable. That's where 24/7 AC repair Dubai services come to the rescue. In this comprehensive guide, we will explore the importance of these services, how they keep you cool and comfortable, and why you should never underestimate the value of a well-maintained AC system.

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading your article. It's evident that a lot of effort went into gathering the data and presenting it in an engaging way.
http tik tok download

cahaya4d said...

Cahaya4d
Cahaya4d Memiliki Beberapa Daftar Nama Situs Game Terbaik dan Terbukti Terpercaya di Asia
Dari yang terbaik menjadi yang paling terbaik sudah kami rangkum disini untuk anda semuanya dan sangat mudah ditemukan di Cahaya4d untuk menemukan Slot terbaik yang diandalkan untuk anda semuanya dibawah ini :
Cahaya4d Slot Pragmatic Play
Cahaya4d Slot Ameba
Cahaya4d CQ9 Slot
Cahaya4d Microgaming dan
Cahaya4d Slot Joker Gaming
Cahaya4d Playtech Slot Online
Cahaya4d PG Slot
Cahaya4d Spadegaming Slot
Cahaya4d Habanero Slot
Ini semua adalah nama-nama Slot terbaik yang ada di Cahaya4d yang bisa anda mainkan dan temukan keuntungan disetiap merek slot yang berbeda ini. Daftar dan login di situs Cahaya4d judi casino online terbaik dan terbukti terpercaya no 1 di Asia. Hanya dengan 1 user id kita sudah bisa bermain diberbagai jenis game yang ada di Cahaya4d yang sudah terbukti is the best di Asia.

istanaliga said...

Istanaliga The first online slot site in Asia that gives big wins to every new player

SATRIA PANJAITAN said...

Satrialiga
"let's join our site, is an online entertainment brand serving the Asia Pacific market, primarily Indonesia, Malaysia and China

satrialiga said...

Satrialiga
satrialiga is the most extraordinary online game with a very interesting that is
loved by many people all over the world

Arsal Butt said...

In this blog, we embark on a journey through the enchanting aura of mint-infused shisha hookah flavors, discovering not only the classics but also the innovative blends that promise an extraordinary shisha experience.

Kapaljp said...

Kapaljpinterersting website

satrialiga said...

Satrialiga Currently, at Gacor, many Maxwin sites are trusted all over the world, please register now

Satrialiga

«Oldest ‹Older   201 – 239 of 239   Newer› Newest»