Friday, December 30, 2011

Good riddance, 2011

Christmas 2011 was going along really well, at least a hell of a lot better than Christmas 2010, when we had double mortgages, sinus infections, terrible weather, and a catastrophic event that damn near ruined us.  This year, Christmas seemed like a nice, gentle, spring breeze in comparison.

By far, the best thing about this Christmas was that for the first time in recent memory, no one was going through hypermesis.  I was so thrilled about that.  Oh my god, was I ever thrilled.

My mom made vegan party potatoes, and they were delicious.  And I could eat them! Without feeling sick! It was amazing.  I was so, so thankful, that for all practical purposes, my sister and I are both done with hyperemesis forever.

After Christmas dinner, Will took a nap.  Rob decided he wanted to hike at Detweiller Park, and I went with him.  I guess I had momentarily  forgotten who Rob is because what he had termed as a hike was for me an all-out, balls to the walls, full steam ahead, trail run.  It was nice, though, and there were really very few times when I thought I was going to die by careening off a cliff face.

Chilled and kind of tired from the trail run, we still managed to stop by Amy MeyPfan's house (actually, her mother's house) so that she and I had a chance to see each other.  I was still feeling pretty good, though a little agitated because the trail run had taken longer than I'd anticipated and I was eager to get home and see what Will was up to.  Then I started feeling kind of bad.  For no apparent reason.  There was nausea.  Seemingly out of nowhere.  It was starting to feel like 2 of the marathons I've run when I haven't eaten for a long time afterwards and gotten really, really @#$%^& up.  I didn't think I could be hungry... I'd just had Christmas dinner.  Those vegan party potatoes.  God, the vegan party potatoes.  Let us not mention them again.

I decided that I was dehydrated.  I hadn't taken my own water on the trail run (thinking, mistakenly, that it was to be a nice and easy hike) and had taken only a sip or two from Rob's Camelback the whole time.  I must be dehydrated.  I needed water.

So we left Amy's, and I still thought I would be able to make a full recovery if I just got some water.  I drank.  I felt worse.  Rob drove, and I texted my Aunt to let her know we were on our way back to my parents.  She had been planning on coming over after Rob and I returned from our "walk at the park."

We got home, and I felt very, very bad.  I was freezing and I thought, I must have been out in the cold too long.  I was sure that drinking some water and taking a hot shower would bring me back to life.  I just wasn't sure how exactly I was going to manage to shower, because I could barely stand up.  Get it together, Melissa, I told myself, Auntie is already on her way over.

So I got in the shower.  The shampoo smelled gross.  The soap smelled gross.  Everthing smelled and felt gross.  Just like when I was pregnant.

And then, before I'd even been able to get my hair rinsed out, I had to bolt from the shower and projectile vomit into the toilet.  Just like when I was pregnant.  Jebus, the first 11 weeks of my pregnancy (the pre-Zofran weeks), I think I puked every time I took a shower.  It @#$%-ing sucked.

I did the mature thing, which was to start sobbing hysterically.

I tried to push all the nastiness aside, because I really wanted to see my Aunt.  Plus, I actually felt a lot better after I threw up, which was great.  That never happened when I had hyperemesis.  I thought it was strange, but it seemed like the most likely explanation was that I'd overexerted myself on the hike, perhaps too soon after Christmas dinner, and that I'd gotten dehydrated.  I've felt this way many times after running... although never to the point of actually throwing up.

Well, I was only able to see my Aunt and Uncle for about 5 minutes before I had to stumble back downstairs and puke again.  And again, and again.  It was scary as hell to me, because my hyperemesis began exactly 3 years ago to the day, when I woke up at my parents' on Christmas morning and puked in the shower.  It brought back a lot of memories, particularly of things that I would very much like to forget.

By the middle of the night when I couldn't go more than an hour without puking, I realized that this must be a stomach virus.

It is ironic, you know.  I was so thrilled about not being nauseous or vomiting this Christmas, and then *bam* the stomach flu.  I puked for maybe 24 hours straight-- even breaking my hyperemesis record of the number of times puked in one day.  After the puking stopped, I felt so completely wiped out.  As in, walking up a flight of stairs made me dizzy enough to nearly pass out.  It was actually several days before that went away.

As of now, I am pretty much back to normal.  The weird thing is, nobody else got sick.  I am so glad that I didn't pass it along to anybody, but it just doesn't make any sense... I shared a water bottle with Rob during our trail run, for crying out loud!  It's a mystery.

Good riddance, 2011.  Don't let the door hit you on the way out.



Anonymous said...

What can I SAY?????? twas NOT a good way to end CHRISTMAS!!!!!!! sooo sorrrrrrrrry!! Whatever VILE bug attacked your innards, MAY IT NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!!!!! when you SLAM the DOOR on 2011, keep the WINDOW open for new and exciting challenges in 2012!!!!! May it hold THE BEST for you all!!!! sorry about the *party potatoes*, NEXT YEAR IN*MAUI* we'll have SOME PINEAPPLE!!!!>:) luv you, mama

Anonymous said...

Don't know whether to laugh or cry with this writing ... I'm sorry you were so sick and know that it made you furious!!! But glad that you don't have to hear about how we ALL got sick... very strange!! I'll remember getting to see Will playing with Woody and many other toys ... and hear him conversing about each and every one ... He is an amazing little boy!!! Maybe we'll have Christmas 2012 sometime in July!!! Happy New Year and lots of love, auntie
P.S. The wine is wonderful!!!

amypfan said...

Ugh. Just ugh. So glad that you're better now.

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